The Secret World Beside Us
by Moonlite Knight
Summary: It was inevitable that one day he, Artemis, would be kidnapped. He just never expected his kidnapping to involve robe-clad, wand-wielding lunatics who are under the impression that he is someone named 'Potter'.
1. Kidnapped in Broad Daylight

_**This is a Harry Potter and Artemis Fowl Crossover. Overused idea, true, but that doesn't make it any less fun to read or write. :)**_

_**Also, no pairings at all for this fic. Maybe a few slight hints here and there, but nothing set, explicit, or graphic. **_

_Disclaimer: I do not own Artemis Fowl or Harry Potter or the Eiffel Tower, or the Statute of Liberty…etc. The list of what I don't own goes on forever. _

**The Secret World Beside Us**

Chapter 1: Kidnapped in Broad Daylight

Artemis Fowl frowned at his reflection in the filthy bathroom mirror.

He was well aware that certain precautions had to be taken so that no potential assassins or similar criminally-minded individuals recognize him, but still, this was too much. He should have never agreed to this, especially when he learned it meant allowing Juliet to come near him with a bag of cosmetics. The wrestling-obsessed young woman had truly outdone herself and that was not necessary in a good way.

The teenager who stared back at him in the cracked mirror provided by the by the cheap hotel they were currently residing in, had very little in common with the habitually neat, well-dressed, intellectual that he truly was. Instead of the one blue eye and one hazel eye he had become accustomed to seeing, Juliet had forced him to don contacts. And she had chosen contacts that made his eyes a stunning emerald green color, no doubt just because she could. He could have had brown eyes, black even, but no, Juliet had purposely chosen a color that he would never willingly wear.

But the color of his eyes paled in comparison to the state of his hair. Instead of being smartly combed back like usual, Juliet had more or less dumped an entire jar of hair gel on his hair and spiked it in a dozen different directions, aside for one part which she combed down to cover his forehead. He now looked as though he had never even heard of a comb. Apparently, this was the Style.

But, overall, it was the clothes that were compelling him to kill Juliet. When Juliet had presented him with the outfit, Artemis had stubbornly stated that he would never be caught dead in such an outfit. And that was exactly why she had chosen it. She reasoned no one would ever recognize the genius in such clothes. Artemis reasoned she had only chosen them to annoy him, and it was working.

Instead of his usual tidy suit, Artemis was now dressed in faded, ripped jeans and a baggy, oversized black sweater with a black t-shirt on underneath. On his feet was a pair of scuffed, filthy trainers. And he had thought his punk outfit as "Archie" had been bad.

Artemis scowled. He looked like a street urchin.

But he had to admit, no one would be able to recognize him now.

.oo000HP&AF00oo.

Butler was worried. That was the first thing Artemis noted as they left the cheap hotel. The Etruscan bodyguard rarely worried, but lately had good reason to. Ever since Artemis had returned from his latest saving the world adventure, things had changed incredibly, both for the better and for the worse.

Artemis was now the brother of two extremely bright and mischievous twins, Myles and Beckett. They adored him. He managed to tolerate them. In truth, Artemis had grown rather fond of the twins, but he was not accustomed to being in the presence of children. It was tough to admit, but he really had no idea how to deal with individuals of their age, so he acted on instinct. And instinct told him to keep up his cool, intelligent façade, even if all he wanted was to hug the two and take part in their little games. His cold exterior never seemed to bother the twins however, and Artemis often found himself included in one of their little games, much to the delight of his parents.

Angeline and Artemis the First had been beside themselves with joy at Artemis's return, but he had been unable to accurately tell the truth behind his disappearance. So after a long inner debate involving morality, his newly acquired powers, and potential loss of freedom, he settled on 'suggesting' that he had been kidnapped. Unfortunately, he had failed to accurately foresee just how seriously parents took the well being of their child.

At once, Butler and Juliet had been rehired and Artemis was placed under their vigilant care. The fairy story Butler had revealed to them in desperation was forgotten, a fact that Artemis _might_ have had a hand in, and the Fowls focused on making their home as impenetrable as possible. The security system at Fowl Manor had been updated, cameras were installed everywhere, and many rules were set down. Normally, Artemis would have simply found ways to deflect the newfound overprotection of his parents, but an event occurred that forced him to change his mind.

Actually, it was several, twenty-two to be exact, events which all had the same goal.

Kidnap Artemis Fowl II.

Luckily, Butler and pure dumb luck had saved him, but now extra precautions were a must whenever he traveled, or his parents would refuse to let him out the front door. For instance, his current costume which was all for the sake of the family trip to Britain. Artemis, Butler, and Juliet had just arrived in order to meet up Artemis's parents and the twins who had left a week earlier for their nice family vacation. So far, everything was running smoothly.

If one overlooked the small fact that Juliet had lost the location of the restaurant they were meeting Artemis's parents at.

As they walked down a busy street, Artemis wondered why they had let Juliet carry the slip of paper with the address of the restaurant written on it. It would have been much easier to keep track of the location himself.

It would have been even better if he had brought his laptop, GPS, or, at the very least, a cell phone. But his mother had made it quite clear that _no_ work and _no_ electronics would be permitted on this vacation. The Fowl family would _relax _and spend quality time together for the next two weeks, she had insisted; Artemis could go back to being a distant teenager once the vacation was over. After taking into account all the worry he had caused her, Artemis found himself unable to disobey, something he was truly regretting at the moment.

Butler scanned the block for the tenth time, unduly tense.

"Calm down, old friend," Artemis said in a carefully casual voice. He hadn't missed the bodyguard's frequent scanning of the area. "On this street only every second building is a restaurant and the restaurant we're searching for is within a thirty black radius, so that leaves us with only sixty different possibilities…"

His voice trailed off as he realized that he was not making the situation any better. He really needed to work on his comforting skills.

"Nice, Artemis," Juliet snickered, looking as the latest fashions in a nearby shop window. "I'm sure Dom feels _so_ much better now."

Artemis sent her a glare that clearly told her that her input was _not_ needed or appreciated.

Taking the hint, Juliet abandoned the fashions and turned towards her brother. "Lighten up, Dom. We'll find them. After all, we've got a genius to help us."

Butler frowned at his sister. Here was yet another reason why Juliet would never make a good bodyguard. She rarely took anything seriously. The only reason she had agreed to be Artemis's bodyguard was because she was truly worried about the boy genius. "The longer Artemis stays out in the open like this, the better target he is for potential assassins and kidnappers."

Juliet slapped Butler lightly on his back. "Don't worry. Artemis, don't you dare get yourself kidnapped or I'll kill you myself, understand?"

Artemis rolled his eyes, but his lips twitched slightly. "Wonderful choices you've given me Juliet, stay with my kidnappers or get killed by you."

He turned towards Butler who was once again scanning the street.

"Butler, everything will be fine. I can take care of myself now a little. Some of what you and Juliet have been attempting to teach me must have sunk in."

Butler smiled slightly, feeling immensely fond of the two younger individual's attempts to cheer him up. It was kind of them, but he would only cease worrying when Artemis was safe with his parents. Though the young boy hid it carefully, Butler could tell he could not wait to be reunited with his family for a relaxing vacation. For the first time in years, the entire Fowl family would be spending quality time with each other.

Artemis turned his attention to the shops lining the streets once he saw the smile. None of the names of any of the restaurants appeared to be familiar. Then he spotted a small shop on the far left on the other side of the street called Fabled Haven. Something stirred in his memory. The name appeared to be familiar; was it the restaurant they were searching for?

"I'm going to check that shop." He said, heading towards it.

He was across the street, weaving deftly through the crowd, before Butler and Juliet could stop him. The two attempted to go after him but a sudden rush of traffic halted them in their tracks. Oblivious to the fact that Butler and Juliet had not followed, Artemis studied the shop. It was quite old and badly in need of a new coat of paint, preferably in a different color. There was a sign in the window proclaiming the day's special: Monkey Brain Soup.

_This cannot be the meeting place, _Artemis thought, turning away from the building.

The cardboard boxes next to the door exploded without warning. Startled, Artemis fell backwards, staring numbly at the burning debris.

_A bomb?_ he thought, dazed. _No, a bomb would have caused more damage, blown off a limb or two at this distance. _

Then he was aware of Butler's and Juliet's shouts and two men in long black coats, carrying sticks, running towards him.

"Artemis, _run_!" Juliet shouted desperately as Butler attempted to find a way through the heavy traffic.

Without a second thought, Artemis got up and ran, away from the advancing men and away from Butler and Juliet. Pushing gaping people aside, he ran, faster than he had ever run before, mentally making a note to thank Juliet later for choosing surprisingly sensible shoes. The streetlamp exploded as he passed, causing several nearby people to scream.

An increasing number of people had realized that something was wrong, but instead of helping him, they were hindering him by standing dumbly in his way.

"Move!" he snapped, shoving two individuals out of the way with his elbows as he desperately tried not to trip.

Ignoring their curses and protests, he glanced back hoping against hope that he was just being paranoid and no one was chasing him.

No such luck.

The men were still after him, murderous expressions on their faces, their sticks held out in front of them. There was a flash of light and a nearby window shattered, showering him with thousands of tiny pieces of glass. How in the world were they doing that?

Ignoring the sting of the glass and gasping for breath, Artemis ran on, hoping the men would give up the chase before he ran out of energy. He turned right into an alley, hoping that he would be able to lose his pursuers in the darkness.

But the alley led to a dead end.

Trapped, he immediately began looking for a way out, a ladder, a stack of boxes, _something_ to help him get over the huge brick wall blocking his way. But there was nothing other than pieces of trash. The sound of pounding footsteps alerted him to the arrival of his pursuers. Artemis whipped around just in time to see one of the men, the fairer one, point his stick at him and shout a strange word, possibly in Latin.

"_Expelliarmus!_"

Artemis felt himself thrown backwards and slammed into the wall closing the alley off, hard. He slid to the ground, too dazed to protest when his shoulders were roughly grabbed by one of the men.

"We got Potter!" a gruff voice said gleefully, as Artemis was pulled to his feet.

_Potter?_ Artemis thought, disoriented. _Who's Potter? _

"Let's get out of here before the bloody Order arrives." A second voice said, impatiently. His grip on Artemis's tightened painfully.

_Order? What Order? What is going on? _Artemis's stomach seemed to sink into itself with dread.

"Don't squirm, Potter," the first voice snickered into his ear. "Or you'll _accidentally _get splinched."

_Splinched?_

The hand on his shoulder tightened further and suddenly Artemis felt a jerk around his navel. Panicking and unable to breathe, he struggled for the breath to scream but before he could, the feeling abruptly vanished.

Opening his eyes, he hadn't even realized that he had shut them, Artemis saw that he was in some sort of room, not the dark alley.

Stomach drooping to what felt like the core of the earth, he gulped.

He had been kidnapped in broad daylight and had no idea how it had happened.

.oo000HP&AF000oo.


	2. Prisoner of an Evil Dark Lord

_Disclaimer: I solemnly swear that I do not own Artemis Fowl or Harry Potter, but I have to admit that it'd very awesome if I did. _

Chapter 2: Prisoner of an Evil Dark Lord

For the first time in Artemis's young life, his extraordinary mind was failing him. No matter how much effort he applied on his brain, he could not think of a way to effectively deal with his situation. Because, no matter how much he was loath to admit it, Artemis was unable to even comprehend half of what had just occurred.

He could not understand how a man could point a stick at him and send him flying backwards into a wall. He could not understand why his kidnappers believed he was someone named 'Potter'. And, above all, he could not understand how he had been kidnapped in broad daylight and not have any idea how it happened.

If there was one thing that Artemis absolutely detested, it was not understanding something.

Therefore, it is quite understandable that he was in too much shock to protest when one of his kidnappers dragged him through a door with a snake engraved on it. Nor did he protest when the other kidnapper uttered a word that Artemis, once again, did not understand, and several statues of cobras moved aside, revealing a secret passage.

Actually, he regained some of his senses when the statutes slithered out of the way, enough to think, _that wasn't right, statues _do not_ move._ Moving out of the way was possible. Rising off the wall and slithering away was not. At least, not in his world. But Artemis was starting to suspect that this was not his world, or any that he was aware of.

"Hurry up, Potter," the fairer kidnapper snarled, giving Artemis a painful push between his shoulder blades. "We wouldn't want to be late for the meeting."

"Yeah," the other kidnapper snickered unpleasantly. "After all, you're the guest of honor."

Even in his dazed state, Artemis did not like the sound of that. Whoever this Potter was, it was obvious these men were not his biggest fans. It was just as he reached that conclusion that the kidnappers halted in front of another door, this one entirely plain aside for a sliver snake with green eyes painted right in the center.

Artemis took advantage of the pause to mentally gather his scattered wits. The second an opportunity to escape appeared, he had to be prepared to take it. And as long as they thought he was this Potter, he really should not do anything that might antagonize them any more than necessary.

The fairer kidnapper spoke. "_Toujour Pur._"

This time Artemis understood what was said, which frankly, was a relief.

Still Pure.

It appeared to be a password of some sort for the doors opened with a oddly sinister creak. The kidnapper who was gripping his shoulder in a rather painful manner shoved him forward as though to check that it was safe to go in.

It seemed that they had reached their destination. Artemis was debating over whether this was good or bad. Ignoring the kidnappers, he examined his surroundings. If there was one thing that Butler had stressed over and over, it was that "ten seconds of observation could save your life." And they had in past.

The room they were in reminded Artemis vividly of a scene from an old horror movie that the twins adored and once forced him to watch. From the cold, damp moss growing on the cracked grey stone walls to the lack of any electronics, Artemis felt as though he had just been dumped in one of the dungeons around during the dark ages. All that was missing was a knight in shining armor and a dragon, locked in a perilous battle to save a fair maiden who did not have enough sense to run while her captor was distracted.

_BAM!_

Artemis jumped at the sudden sound and raised an eyebrow as a human shaped figure appeared from a door that he could have sworn was not there before. Dramatic much? More figures followed, all dressed in long, black, loose clothes that looked suspiciously like dresses and masks that even Artemis had to admit were definitely winners of the "Most Creepy" category in any contest.

All too soon, the room was filled, but still, Artemis nor his kidnappers moved. There was an undeniable feeling of tension in the air. It was like waiting for a comet outside your window to strike you dead. Forcing himself to remain calm, Artemis decided to make no move yet, and just observe these people. It was better for him to play the meek hostage and get them to lower their guard before he made his move. Whatever it was.

It was then that he became aware of something slippery and rough touching his ankles. Looking down, he nearly jumped of out his skin again. It was a snake. A much too huge, cold-blooded _snake,_ which was currently wrapping itself around his ankles. Despite the fact that he had been accused of being cold blooded on many an occasion, Artemis despised reptiles.

"Well, Nagini, have you greeted our guest?" hissed a soft, cold, cruel voice.

Looking up, Artemis saw what was probably the oddest thing he had seen all day. And that was certainly saying something considering the events that had occurred since he had left that cheap hotel.

A tall man, or something close enough, dressed in the same black dress like clothing as the others sat at a throne in the center of the room, his face obscured by the hood of his clothing. Though Artemis could not see his face, he felt his skin crawl unpleasantly. Hate was practically radiating off the figure. If it didn't sound so corny, he would have said that the man was pure evil.

The snake, Nagini, began coiling itself around his neck, hissing. Artemis barely managed to suppress a shudder as felt the snake's tongue taste the air just a few centimeters from his check, though he could not help but squeeze his eyes shut.

The snake was _heavy_; it took all of Artemis's strength just to stay standing. Then, suddenly, the weight was gone. Surprised, Artemis opened his eyes to see the snake floating towards the figure on the throne. It hadn't sprouted wings or a propeller, but it was still floating. The part of Artemis's brain that was not numb with shock began wondering about his sanity.

"Now, Nagini, that's enough," the man hissed in the same cold voice as before. He stroked the snake's head in the same manner as one pets a dog. "We don't want to harm Mr. Potter. Yet."

He turned back to Artemis, who kept his face as emotionless as possible, given the circumstances.

"You're awfully quiet, _Harry_," he needlessly stressed out the name "No wonderfully heroic speeches to spout? Where's the courage you Gryffindors are renowned for?"

Artemis didn't say a word. He had just reached the conclusion that either these people were insane, or he was. As he was relatively certain that his mind had not snapped, he had enough degrees to know when it had. Which left the theory, that these people were the insane ones. It was not a comforting thought, but it was more comforting than the idea that these people could use magic.

The man sighed, as though disappointed. "And I was so looking forward to your pathetic comebacks."

The people surrounding them laughed when the man did, the high shrill echoing in the room. It was pathetic really, but still rather creepy. The laughter stopped abruptly, and the copycat Ku Klux Klan followed suit. Artemis took a small step backwards and bumped into the kidnapper standing behind him.

Suddenly the whole atmosphere in the room darkened. Though still unable to see the man's face, Artemis could fell his sudden sharp glare.

"Malfoy," the robbed figure hissed, anger replacing the amusement. "What is this?"

The fairer man who had kidnapped Artemis audibly gulped and took a step forward, stepping around Artemis.

"Forgive me, my Lord," he muttered, bowing his head respectfully. "but I do not understand."

The very air around the hooded man seemed to crackle with fury. "Where is Potter?" he snapped.

"B-but, my lord, he's standing right here—"

"Silence!"

The shout rang through the room. No one moved a muscle, not even Artemis.

"Check his forehead."

The two kidnappers nearly fell over themselves in their haste to follow the order.

Artemis, needless to say, was now quite unsettled by what was happening and tried to back away. The other kidnapper grabbed Artemis's shoulders, effectively holding him in place, while Malfoy quickly ruined Artemis's ridiculous hairstyle. For some reason, the sight of Artemis's pale, unblemished forehead led the kidnappers to pale themselves. They hastily withdrew their hands from him and turned fearfully towards their Lord.

"So…" the man said, tapping one thin, grayish finger on the armrest of his throne.

"My lord, please, forgive us." The man who had been singled out before stammered. He seemed even more terrified than his companion. "He looks just like Potter! The same eyes, the same hair, even his clothes are the same muggle rags Potter often wears! We thought—"

"I do not want your excuses, Malfoy," the figure on the throne interrupted. "I want Potter. But you can't seem to understand that, can you?"

The hooded man pulled out a stick, like the one Artemis's kidnappers had, seemingly out of nowhere. "I wonder how your family will feel about this latest failure?" he sneered. "Especially your son, who thinks himself too good to join us?"

Malfoy fell to his knees, startling Artemis into taking a few steps backwards. "My lord, I beg you, please…do not harm them…"

It was a horribly pathetic sight.

Their lord laughed, a merciless sound that sent a shill racing down Artemis's back. "Spare them, Malfoy? Punish you instead?" he mocked. "No, it will leave more of an impact, I think, if I kill off a few relations."

"That is a bit harsh." Artemis said suddenly, drawing all attention to himself. It was not a smart move he knew, but the sight of the man begging for his son's life was…unsettling. He could not simply stand by quietly now. "He made a mistake, why must his family be the ones to pay the price?"

The impact of his words was astounding.

The crowd of people seemed to tense simultaneously and began to shout vulgarities at him. The kidnappers paled even fruther and moved away from him as though he had suddenly contracted an infectious, deadly disease. Only the figure on the throne revealed no emotion.

"I do not recall giving you permission to speak in my presence, muggle," he said in his high, soft voice.

Artemis blinked in surprise. He had been called many things before in his short life, but never 'muggle'. He was not entirely sure what it meant, but it was obviously not a compliment.

_Perhaps discarding my disguise as a meek hostage was not exactly the best plan. _Artemis thought, surveying the scene before him.

But what was done was done. He couldn't change what he had said, just like how he couldn't change the fact that he had been kidnapped by this queer lot.

Malfoy spoke hesitantly. "My lord, I—"

"Silence, you imbecile." The man snapped, not even bothering to look at the cowering man. "The muggle and I are having a delightful conversation, though he seems to be lacking the necessary skills. You haven't answered my question, muggle. Did I or did I not give you permission to speak?"

Artemis did not need to be a genius to realize that he was being toyed with. His annoyance of this led him to make what was possibly the biggest mistake he had made all day. Even bigger than getting out of bed that morning, leaving Butler's and Juliet's side, or running into that dark alley.

He attempted to answer the man.

"I—"

"_Crucio_."

The pain hit without warning.

It was nothing like Artemis had ever felt before. It was though his very blood was on fire, as though someone was attempting to cut his soul from his body with a very dull knife. And it went on and on and on. It took all of his willpower to not scream in agony. He clenched his hands so forcefully that his knuckles turned white. His eyes were squeezed shut so tightly that it did not seem possible that they would ever open again. He bit through his lower lip, causing blood to drip lightly onto his shirt.

But he did not scream, whimper, or give any indication that he was in pain. A causal bystander would merely have thought that the boy had a bad case of indigestion, judging by his face. Suddenly, it grew fainter and fainter. And then, the pain was gone. Artemis could have fallen to his knees in gratitude, but managed to stop himself. He unscrewed his eyes.

The room was dead silent. He was the center of attention, and for once, Artemis wished otherwise.

"Interesting," the man on the throne said. "I'm told not even the Longbottoms lasted that long, and they screamed most beautifully."

Artemis blinked his eyes, trying to get rid of the blue sparks that were clouding his vision.

_Wait a minute…_

He looked down at his hands. Blue sparks were racing from them and traveling all over his body. He could feel the aches left by the pain disappearing and his wounded lip healing.

Unconsciously, he had called upon his small reserve of stolen fairy magic to protect him from the pain. The result was that it had stopped the pain. For now at least.

"How did you do that, muggle?" the man demanded. "That was not magic."

Artemis did not answer. It was not because of cowardice; he simply did not wish to feel the pain again. And besides, what could he say? He did not want to betray the fairies, now that they were friends, more or less.

The man lifted the hood off of his face, letting Artemis see it for the first time. "I have never met a muggle with a will as strong as yours before. Intriguing…"

Artemis did not care much about the compliment. He was just trying not to scream. The man was like a bogeyman out of the nightmares of a child. A very demented child. Artemis hoped he never, ever had the misfortune to meet that child.

Fortunately, Artemis's mental struggle went unnoticed.

"Malfoy."

The blond kidnapper jumped at the sudden attention.

"Throw the muggle in one of the cells in the dudgeon." The creature, for he was surely not a man, said, standing up. "I shall deal with him later, at a more leisure pace."

The next thing Artemis knew, he was waking up in a dirty, damp cell.

_They must have knocked me out,_ he realized, getting up and brushing as much dirt as he could off of his clothes. _Most likely with their 'magic'._

Artemis was quite sure now that these people possessed magic of a different sort than the fairies. Despite the fact that these people were holding him hostage, Artemis could help but feel a shimmer of excitement. Magic that could be wielded by _humans_. He had to find out more.

He glanced at the door.

It was obviously locked by their 'magic', so it could be ruled out as a possible escape route. Artemis sat down on the cleanest part of the floor, which, coincidentally, was also the area farthest from the door. He settled into his routine thinking procedure and began to mediate. Now that the shock was wearing off, he began plotting his escape. He had no idea where he was, so it was safe to assume that neither did Butler or Juliet. He had to rely solely upon himself to escape.

Artemis allowed a small smile to grace his features. These lunatics would rue the day they had crossed Artemis Fowl the Second.

But for now, he was the prisoner of an evil dark lord.

.oo000HP&AF000oo.


	3. Strange Ideas, Weird Theories and,,,

_Disclaimer: I do not possess the ability to convince the true owners of Harry Potter and Artemis Fowl to let me own them. Make your own conclusions from that statement._

Chapter 3: Strange Ideas, Weird Theories, and Useless Plans

There was no other word for it. One could search the entire English dictionary and still reach the same conclusion.

Butler was panicking.

Or, if you do not possess enough imagination to imagine Butler experiencing such an emotion, we shall say that Butler was a little more than just mildly concerned. Either way, the Etruscan bodyguard was not his usual stoic self. And what self-respecting bodyguard would be? He had lost his principle in _broad daylight_. Oh, this recent incident would do wonders for his career record.

_How could Artemis do this?_ he wondered, pacing back and forth in the room of the cheap hotel in which they had spent the previous night. _How could he vanish after finally coming back? How could I not _stop_ him?_

After evading the police that had shown up to investigate, he and Juliet had searched the entire street so many times that they had lost count, only to reach the conclusion that Artemis Fowl the Second was not there. Nor had they been able to find any indication of where he might have gone. It was as though he had simply vanished into thin air.

Butler mentally admonished himself for not bringing at least his cell phone with him. Yes, Mrs. Fowl had ordered him to make sure that no electronics were brought on the trip, but still. He had spent years training to be able to do what few could. Hadn't he learned some common sense along the way?

"No good, Dom" Juliet said, coming into the room. "The owner's too cheap to let us use his phone. Actually, he's too cheap to even own a phone. He uses some kind of weird typewriter to send messages, can you believe that?"

Butler gritted his teeth. There had to be something they could do. Come on, think, think…

But Artemis was the thinker, not him. And Butler had doubts that even the genius could devise a plan to recover someone who had simply vanished, leaving behind no visible clues.

"Dom?" Juliet asked hesitantly. "Maybe you should sit down for a minute."

Unconsciously, Butler did as she said, too focused on coming up with a plan to really notice what he was doing. "Why did we come back here on the first place?" he asked, gripping his forehead with his right hand.

Juliet shrugged. "I thought Artemis might have escaped those two freaky dudes and come back."

She didn't tell him the real reason why. Juliet was seriously worried about her older brother. While she was also concerned about Artemis, she reasoned that if he had managed come back after being lost in time, or something like that Juliet still wasn't exactly sure what had happened, he could be able to handle a couple of human kidnappers. Actually, between Artemis's natural intelligence and the training he had received from both her and Butler over the past few months, she almost felt sorry for the kidnappers. Almost.

"He's not here." Butler muttered, massaging his temples. "He's not anywhere."

Juliet glanced at her brother's tired face. No one would admit it out loud, but there was no denying it. Butler was getting old. All they had done was search the street a few—okay, more than a few—times and Butler had become so pale that Juliet had to immediately think of a way to get her brother to get some rest. And so, they were now back at the cheap hotel with no idea what to do next.

Butler had fallen silent again, mentally going over everything he had ever been taught, searching for a solution. It was rare for Butler to show so much emotion, but, apparently, the older he got, the more emotional he became. The fiction novels he was so fond of were excellent proof of that.

The silence in the room was growing to a suffocating level. To Juliet at least. In her opinion, Butler was being way too grim. Sighing dramatically, she flopped onto the second bed in the room, carelessly dropping her overstuffed bag onto the floor.

"Man," she said. "We can never get a break with Artemis, can we?"

No answer.

Juliet bravely tried again. "Being a genius, you'd think he'd use that brain of his to stay out of trouble, not dive headfirst into it."

Butler didn't even seem to hear.

Juliet frowned. What were they supposed to do, blockade the entire country and drill everyone, down to the smallest child? Or maybe they could ask the fairies for help. Actually, Holly might be willing to help. Now the question was how to contact her.

_We could hire a jet and have it write a message in the sky, declaring 'Fairies do exist! They live below us with technology centuries more advanced than ours!'_ Juliet thought sarcastically. Yeah, that'd work. Only then the fairies would be too busy trying to kill them for blowing the secret to help. She sat up and scowled. Darn Artemis! She was a wrestler turned bodyguard, not a mathematician! How was she supposed to know what to do next?

She kicked the poor innocent bag by her feet, causing it to fly several feet through the air, before landing in the middle of the room. One of the outside pockets burst open. Spilling out were brushes, lipsticks, some other bits of makeup, and something else. That something else rolled away from the bag and came to a full stop by Butler's feet.

Butler and Juliet simply stared at it. Juliet was the first to break the silence.

"Well, that's convenient."

.oo000HP&AF000oo.

Several thousands of miles away and below the ground, Holy Short felt a sudden chill. She had a very bad feeling, the kind of feeling she usually got when everything was about to spiral completely out of her control. This kind of feeling, more often than not, involved a certain too-smart-for-his-own-good Mud Boy.

Holy sighed, put aside the mystery novel she had been enjoying, and waited for the inevitable call.

Oh, she had just known things had been too quiet lately.

.oo000HP&AF000oo.

Still trapped in his oh-so-comfortable cell, Artemis opened his eyes. He had just spent the last thirty minutes pondering his predicament and reached several intriguing conclusions.

The first and foremost issue he had contemplated was his imprisonment. Nothing too taxing. It had taken him merely three of those thirty minutes to form a foolproof plan to escape. All he had to do was test a few details and then he'd be all set.

However, Artemis was not entirely sure if he wanted to escape at the very moment. Leaving now might ensure his removal from this world, not forever, but possibly for an extended period of time. And Artemis was not ready to leave, not without gaining at least some knowledge about this new 'magic'.

That was the second, third, and fourth issue Artemis had spent his time pondering. Just what was this 'magic', and how were humans able to use it? Artemis just could not find a reason without the necessary facts.

Suddenly too amped to remain sitting, he got up and began to pace. He discovered that it took him exactly twenty steps in any direction to reach a wall, which, he had previously noted, were caked with moss and crumbling with age. He pressed a finger to the rock, frowning in distaste as it crumbled, leaving his finger coated with a fine layer of grey dust. Really, hadn't his kidnappers ever heard of remodelling and safety hazards?

Sighing, he wiped his hand on his jeans. They were so dirty and ripped that it really didn't make that much of a difference, except renew Artemis's resolve to soak in a hot tub for no less than four hours when this was over.

_Escape is no longer an issue,_ he thought, settling back in 'his' corner again. _Not that it ever really was an issue. What is an issue is getting back to Butler and Juliet._

Butler, Artemis was sure, would try his best to rescue him, but would he know where to look? His kidnappers had distinct English accents, but that did not necessarily mean that he was still in England. Hopefully, Butler and Juliet would discover the fairy transmitter he had hidden in Juliet's bag and use it to contact Holly for help. Had his mother truly believed that he would leave all devices of communication behind? Besides, Artemis reasoned to subdue his confounded conscious, his mother was not even aware of the existence of the fairy communicator, so it was obviously not included in her list.

_Holly…_

Brow wrinkled, Artemis studied his hands. Apparently he had more magic left than he had originally thought. Perhaps, since he was a human, not a fairy, the magic he had liberated had somehow mutated inside of him. He closed his eyes and visualized a blue spark.

He opened his eyes to see his right hand glowing.

Hmm. Not exactly the result he had been aiming for, but the fact that something had happened was a start. He had done some magic without using one of those sticks his kidnappers seemed to need, so they apparently had not received their magic from fairies, like him.

Artemis massaged his temples, deep in thought. _Perhaps the demon warlocks, then? _

Maybe, years ago, a demon warlock had married a human and their child was a mixture of both. A human with demon magic. Hey, weirder things have happened. Besides, the leader of the kidnappers was certainly ugly enough to be a demon.

_Interesting,_ Artemis thought. _If that is true, then, maybe—_

_Creak…_

CRASH!

The door of his cell opened, distracting Artemis from his thoughts. As he turned to see who had entered, he put a hand on the brick wall behind him and concentrated.

.oo000HP&AF000oo.

"Wait just a minute," Holly commanded, sitting on Juliet's bed and observing the two worried humans. "Let me get this straight: Artemis was kidnapped by two men in dresses with sticks that fired out blasts of light which were actually harmful?"

"Yup." Juliet replied as she tried to stuff all of her makeup back into her torn bag. "Despite how crazy it sounds, it's all true."

"Can you help us, Holly?" Butler asked, getting straight to the whole point behind her visit.

Holly gave him what she hoped was an encouraging smile. "Well, I used up a lot of favours just getting here, but if Mulch is able to get through to Foaly, then we'll have a pretty good chance of finding him."

Butler nodded, already aware that Foaly kept Artemis under surveillance, even now.

Despite the fact that Butler and Juliet were clearly worried about Artemis, Holly just couldn't resist. "Well, at least we know one thing."

They both turned to look at her.

"Karma always wins in the end."

.oo000HP&AF000oo.


	4. Trial and Error, A Lot of Error

_Disclaimer: Artemis Fowl is a well-known and respected genius. I am an unknown and unappreciated writer. We have absolutely nothing in common, aside from the fact that I don't own him. At all and that's the truth. _

Chapter 4 Trial and Error, A Lot of Error

If everything in life happened the way we expected it to, then it would truly be a rather boring existence. Unexpected surprises tended to add spice to an otherwise quite bland reality. However, at the moment, Artemis wished that for once his life would just follow his plan, without any unexpected or potentially dangerous twists.

But of course, he was Artemis Fowl II, the boy who had discovered the existence of fairies, stolen their gold, and traveled through time. Life just had to be, and stay, exciting for him.

When Artemis had pressed his hands against the dirty wall as the door opened, his intention had been to collapse the doorway onto the individual who entered. However, that was not what had happened. Rather than collapsing, the dirty iron door turned a healthy liquid brown color.

Artemis frowned. That was unexpected. Quickly dropping his hands, Artemis carefully avoided looking at the now auburn door.

The kidnapper, a man in his late twenties, was fortunately, or perhaps unfortunately, too focused on being a bully to notice the color change.

"Here, you filthy muggle," the dress-wearing madman snarled, throwing a plate of some unidentifiable mush onto the grimy ground. "Be thankful my Lord still has use for you, else you'd be rotting in a hole somewhere."

"So instead I have the pleasure of rotting in this cell." Artemis replied coolly, eying the dish with distaste. "I believe I would prefer the hole."

The man growled and pulled out a long stick. For a second, Artemis was certain the man would use it on him, but instead the man pointed it at the plate lying forlornly on the floor.

"_Reducto_."

The food on the plate appeared to explode, spraying the walls, ground and Artemis with the mush. Only the kidnapper was spared.

"Next time," he growled, raising the stick in what was obviously meant to be a threatening manner. "It will be you, not the food."

Artemis kept his mouth shut, but didn't back down despite the fact that he was slightly disturbed by what had just occurred. He absolutely refused to be intimated by someone in a dress, waving around a stick. It was true that the stick could cause much harm, as it had just been demonstrated, but still. The man looked much too ridiculous to be all that frightening.

Artemis's silence seemed to boost the kidnapper's confidence. He kicked the empty plate toward the boy genius.

"Too bad," he gloated. "That was your only meal for the day."

Artemis continued to subject the man to his infamous glare.

"No matter, you'll survive without food or water for a day. Or two."

Artemis didn't break his gaze.

The boost in confidence appeared to have been temporary. The kidnapper was visibly growing uneasy with Artemis's unwavering stare.

"Yeah, w-well. You'd just better know your place, muggle." He stammered before turning and rushing out the door.

He was in too much of a hurry to get away from the creepy, cold-eyed kid that he didn't even notice that something was wrong with the door.

Back in his cell, Artemis's lip twitched upward slightly. That had been surprisingly easy.

He knew it was childish, goading his kidnappers, but, hey, it was the small things in life that brought the greatest pleasures. And besides, it was time and past that these people learn exactly whom they were dealing with.

oo000HP&AF000oo.

Nothing seemed to be going right for Foaly lately.

His lady friend was mad that he was spending more time working than with her, his last few inventions had been complete failures, and he was having a bad hair day. Oh, and don't forget the fact that there were two worried mud people, one who could, and probably would, break each of his inventions as easily as breaking his bones, and an equally worried, but more irritated, fairy on the line.

"Foaly, I know you're there. Stop pretending that we're losing connection."

Darn, there went that excuse.

"Oh, well, they must have fixed it." He said, feigning surprise. "You know, despite all the importance they put on themselves, Section Nine's technology is not all that great."

"Foaly." Holly said, not buying the excuse for a second. "Stop fooling around and tell us where Artemis is so that we can go save him. I can't wait to find out who was actually smart enough to kidnap him in the first place."

"Don't you mean dumb enough?" Foaly heard Juliet's voice faintly in the background.

"Well," Foaly said, trying to stall for time. "You see, I…"

"Foaly, just spit it out already." Butler snapped, quite loudly into Holly's transmitter.

Foaly winced, resisting the urge to rub his ear. He knew the giant Mud Man was worried, but still, this was no time get mad at the centaur. Actually, there was no good time to be mad at the clever and striking centaur. But that was enough stalling for him. It was better to face the music now, while Holly and the others still had at least an ounce of patience left.

He took a deep breath and hoped that he'd still be alive to have dinner later with his lady friend. "There's a small, tiny, microscopic problem."

There was a pause. Foaly desperately hoped that they weren't plotting his death and plunged on.

"You know that Artemis sent out several decoys to confuse me right?"

The others made small noises of agreement.

Everyone knew that. It was a sort of game that Foaly and Artemis played. Artemis would hide and Foaly would try to find him. Sort of like the Mud Man game Hide and Go Seek, but with more advanced technology.

"Well, this time, the decoys were exceptionally well played. I mean it, Artemis really is a genius."

"Foaly," Holly interrupted as realization dawned upon her. "Are you trying to say that Artemis beat you? That you couldn't figure out which was the real one?"

"No," Foaly protested immediately. "He just managed to confuse me a little. Besides, I know which is the real Artemis now."

He left out the fact that he had only figured it out a couple of hours before Holly had called.

"So tell us," Holly demanded, losing patience with the centaur's mind games. "Where is he?"

"I'm trying," Foaly snapped back. "I'm trying to explain that the tracker died so I have no idea where he is."

Foaly winced at the stunned silence that followed his declaration. Maybe he should have been a tad more tactful.

"What, did the tracker run out of batteries or something?" Juliet asked in a carefully casual manner.

"No," Foaly replied, rather offended by the question. "I don't use batteries in the tracers anymore. Too inconvenient, always dying at the worst moments possible."

He tapped one hoof on the ground nervously. Holly hadn't said a word. She probably had already realized what his suspicions were.

"There are only two reasons why the tracer would die. One, Artemis messed around with it. But he's never bothered with that before, so that most likely isn't it."

"And the second reason?" Butler asked in a stoic voice.

Foaly took a deep breath and continued. "Or two, the person wearing the trace no longer has a functioning heart. We may be too late. Artemis may already be dead."

oo000HP&AF000oo.

Artemis was amazed. No, scratch that, he was speechless. And that was quite an accomplishment as every few events had ever rendered him into such a state.

But he had a good reason to lose his usual composure. One of the laws of science had just been broken in front of him, and more shockingly, he had been involved in this astonishing fest. After he had frightened the kidnapper out of the room, Artemis gone over to inspect the now brown, firmly locked, door, and had made an incredible discovery.

The door was made of wood. He had somehow managed to turn a metal door into wood. That was just not possible. Metal and wood did not share any share any similar chemical elements. Even with fairy magic, Artemis was quite certain that it was impossible to turn metal into wood when they had absolutely nothing in common other than the fact that both were used as building materials.

In short, what Artemis had just done was quite impossible.

Artemis shook his head to clear his thoughts. He could gawk in stunned silence at his great deed later. Right now he should devote his time and effort into finding out just how he had done this.

He carefully ran his finger over the surface of the door, frowning in concentration. The wood didn't feel any different from normal wood, not that he went around touching trees all of the time. It didn't look any different either, aside from the fact that it had a healthier glow than most of the trees that Artemis had ever seen before.

His brow wrinkled even more. That didn't help at all with his current theory.

Artemis's first thought was that perhaps he hadn't turned the door into wood at all. Maybe there had been a small piece of wood, like a splinter or a twig, that had been stuck on the door and Artemis had just managed to accidentally cause it to grow rapidly with his magic so that it completely covered the door.

However the apparent healthiness of the door disputed his hypothesis. The theorized twig would most likely have been stuck on the door for ages and, in the darkness of the cell, it could not have maintained such a vibrant coloring.

Artemis stepped back and regarded the door for a moment. Then he stepped forward and carefully and safety began to knock on different areas of the door, listening carefully. Even if his theory was incorrect, Artemis didn't necessarily have to just sit back and wait for his kidnappers to come get him.

He would make his escape now and come back later to learn more about the kidnappers; 'magic'. Right now, his own magic was more important, especially since it seemed to be able to accomplish seemingly impossible feats.

Artemis reached as high as he could, still knocking on the wood, and trying to ignore just how dirty his clothes felt on his skin. He wasn't running away, he told himself. No, he was simply making a strategic retreat. This had nothing to do with the fact that he had no wish to feel that pain that was to obviously come with his next meeting with the kidnappers. Nor did it have anything to do with not wanting to suffer through Holly's teasing about how she had once again had to save him. No, of course not.

_Tap, tap, tap, tuk. _

Artemis raised an eyebrow and tapped the area twice more.

Tuk, tuk.

A small smile appeared on his face. Good he'd found it. The door's weak point. Butler's training would actually come in handy.

He took a step backwards and breathed deeply, calming his mind.

Normally he preferred to leave violence and anything else that required him to physically dirty his hands to Butler or Holly, but in this case, he would have to make an exception. Not that he had a huge variety of choices in the first place.

_Alright, _he thought, continuing to take calming breaths. _The first thing Butler said to do was focus your mind on the point of contact. _

He shifted his gaze to a specific part on the door about three feet down from the top and five inches inside.

Artemis paused for a second to complement whether his training had actually accomplished anything in terms of his physical strength. Judging by his plan, it had certainly affected his mental strength. But doubt wasn't going to get him anywhere. Artemis closed his eyes and visualized the training session in his mind. He could just see Butler bark out the next step. _With your destination in mind, strike!_

With all the strength that he was able to muster, Artemis kicked the door.

In every training session that Butler and Juliet had managed to convince him to participate in, he had never managed to actually even make a dent in his target, usually a piece of wood or, in one odd case, a piece of cheese painted to look like wood. Still, Artemis was willing to hope that perhaps the severity of his situation had maybe somehow subconsciously boosted his strength.

Unfortunately, it was not so.

A tiny crack appeared on the door. Nothing else happen aside for the fact that Artemis had probably broken his foot.

Ouch!

Discarding any dignity that he had left, Artemis grabbed his throbbing foot, hoping on his right to maintain balance. _Ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch! Stupid plan, stupid door! _

The small crack that had appeared grew slowly at first and then rapidly as Artemis hopped up and down on one foot, cursing everything. Within seconds the crack had spread to each corner of the door, which then crumbled onto the ground.

Pain momentarily forgotten, Artemis stared at the mess. _I guess all those bruises weren't for nothing then. _

He still stood no chance against a moving target, but against a stationary one, like the door, he actually stood a fighting chance. Artemis hopped forward and picked up a piece of the door to show to Foaly later.

And then, ignoring his paining foot and his brief loss of composure, Artemis hobbled out of the cell and onto only time would tell what.

.oo000HP&AF000oo.

**Note1: One part of the conversation between Foaly and the others wasn't my own idea, it was given to me by Mojo817, so credit goes to them. And sorry if I kind of butchered it.**

**Note2: As for Artemis kicking down the door, that was what inspired this fic. In the middle of French class, I suddenly had a vivid image of Artemis trapped in a cell, kicking down the door to escape. I'm still unsure how that image came to mind, but I couldn't forget it, so I started this fic just to write that scene. Now I'm happy ^^ Please ignore the fact that it is probably very OOC.**


	5. Set in Motion

_Disclaimer: You all should know by now that it is quite impossible to own Artemis Fowl or any of its other characters, especially if you are an unknown wannabe writer. _

Chapter 5: Set in Motion

Holly was not worried. No she was not. And anyone who dared to suggest that she was would become newly acquainted with the ground.

After all, she had absolutely no reasons to be worried. Artemis was too much of a nuisance to just peacefully die. The tracer had most likely malfunctioned, or perhaps Artemis had been struck with the uncontrollably desire to tinker with it. There were thousands of other possibilities and Holly was not the type to believe the most pessimistic one, despite how much evidence there was to support it.

Just because Foaly's equipment said that the young genius was dead did not necessarily mean that he was. The fact that Foaly's equipment rarely failed did not matter. After all, hadn't Foaly's equipment once told them that Mulch was dead? And the aforementioned dwarf was currently raiding her kitchen and contacting old acquaintances for any information on who may have kidnapped Artemis.

Though the centaur would never admit it, his inventions were not entirely foolproof—though they were pretty darn close.

_So why, _Holly thought, as the wind ruffled her hair. _Why do I feel just like I did when Root was killed?_

As she flew to the countryside where, according to the transmitter, Artemis had "died", Holly vowed that if the boy genius was alive and she got even one little gray hair from all this excitement and worrying, not even Butler could save him from her wrath.

But deep in her heart, she knew that she really wanted to find her friend alive.

.oo000HP&AF000oo.

The streets of London were, more often than not, teeming with excitement and people rushing. Each person followed their own path, not knowing or caring about the destination of the person next to or across from them. Everyone had their own worries and plans and no time to waste on those of others.

Quite understandably, Butler's size brought some attention and Juliet's looks did catch the eye of a few of the locals, but no one went out of their way to talk to either of the Butlers. For that they were glad. They had no time to waste making small talk with overcurious strangers while Artemis's life hung in the balance.

They were on their way to a building where, according to Foaly, there may be a clue indicating the identity of those idiotic enough to dare kidnap a Fowl. It had taken some persuading on Foaly's and Holly's part to convince the bodyguard that it would be more efficient if Holly went alone to the last location the transmitter had a feed from Artemis. She could most likely get there much quicker than any Mud Man contraption, a fact that Butler reluctantly acknowledged.

Besides, the building which Foaly claimed held a clue to Artemis's whereabouts was a Mud Man dwelling, meaning Holly would not be able to enter unless she managed to find a loophole, and that would have most likely taken time that they did not have.

"So," Juliet said, stepping out of the way of a harassed looking woman with a baby stroller, "This place we're going to, will it really help us?"

While Foaly had briefed Butler and Holly about the plan, Juliet had gone on a mission to find a working phone. She had finally managed to find cell phone that actually received a signal in the hands of one of the residents, who was kind enough to let her make a 5 minute call if she promised not to tell _them _where he was. Juliet had quickly agreed, though she had no knowledge who 'them' was, and had made a quick call to Artemis's parents.

She couldn't tell them Artemis was missing again, so she altered the truth a little and told them that their flight had been delayed due to some unexpected turbulence. Not the truth, but not entirely a lie either. However, it had taken her a while to get away from the man who seemed to think that his television was watching him. By the time she had returned to their room, a plan had been formed, Juliet had been given a brief explanation, and they had gone off to save the young genius.

"Foaly appears to think so" Butler replied, walking straight ahead. People moved out of the way for him, instead of the other way around. "And considering his track record, I'm willing to trust him." _With Artemis's life. _

Juliet glanced at her older brother's drawn and tired face. He hadn't rested nearly as much as she would have liked.

"I think we can trust that geek as well. But," she said, jumping off the curb to avoid being run over by a skateboard, only to hop back on as a car honked and speed by. "We don't have to move so fast. We can slow down a little."

Butler didn't change his pace. "I don't want to waste any more time than absolutely necessary."

Juliet sighed and gave up attempting to walk right next to her brother as yet another person almost walked right into her. She altered her pace so that she was right behind him. It was much easier to walk in the path cleared by Butler than having to jump left and right to avoid near collisions.

"How about we slow down just a little?" she suggested.

"Juliet—" Butler started before a teen with brilliant red hair bumped into him. Hard.

Butler's pace faltered for a few seconds, but the teen was not so lucky. He crashed into the ground, dragging two others, a girl with bushy brown hair and a boy with glasses and messy black hair, along with him.

Butler, a bit worried that he may have caused some damage, stopped, as did Juliet.

"Are you three ok?" Juliet asked, trying to keep from laughing.

Several of the people passing by did not even bother an attempt at politeness. They laughed quite openly at the teen's misfortune. Quite understandably, that made the three extremely mortified and a bit grouchy.

"No, we're not alright!" the red head snapped, rubbing his head, which had met the pavement in a particularly painful manner. "We just got run over by a bloody…" He broke off as he caught sight of Juliet and his mouth fell open.

Juliet rolled her eyes at his reaction and turned her attention to the other two. Apparently the bushy haired girl did not like her friend's open admiral of Juliet, judging by the fact that she wacked him around the head.

"Ouch! What was that for, Hermione?" the red head said, rubbing the injured area and shifting his gaze onto the girl, Hermione.

"Be polite Ron," she hissed in reply before addressing Juliet who was quite amused by their banter.

"I'm sorry," she said, accepting Juliet's offered hand and getting up. "My friend should have been paying more attention to where he was going. He's really sorry, right?" The glare she gave the poor boy frightened away any thoughts he might have had about disagreeing.

"Er, yeah. Sorry." Ron said sheepishly as he and the other boy got up.

"Don't worry about it," Juliet said cheerfully. "It's seems like you guys were the ones who got the wrong end of the stick."

"You can say that again." The black haired boy said, adjusting his glasses and grinning.

Before Juliet could reply, Butler cleared his throat loudly to get her attention. Now that he knew the teens did not require a trip to the hospital, he was anxious to continue on their way.

"Just a second," She told him before turning back to the three. "Well, if you're alright, then we really must be going. Bye!"

However the teenagers were too awed by Butler's appearance, mainly his height, to respond, though Hermione did manage a weak wave.

As Juliet turned away, she heard the red head whisper, "Blimey! He's huge! How much do you want to bet that he's got giant's blood in him?"

_Well, that was a bit odd, _Juliet thought as she jogged to catch up with her brother._ Most people would say Dom is a giant, not that he was giant's blood. _

She shrugged the thought away as she fell back in pace with her brother. Maybe it was just a British teen way of speaking. After all, teenagers did come up with the strangest expressions. Plus, slang was bound to change from country to country, so it wasn't surprising that she had found it strange even though she had been a teen herself just a few years ago.

"Hey, Dom," she started, planning to restart their earlier conversation.

However, Butler did not intend to give her the chance.

"I'm not slowing down, Juliet." he said, cutting her off. "We've wasted enough time as it is."

"I wasn't going to say that." Juliet replied indignantly while mentally cursing her brother's stubbornness. Fine, she'd give up attempting to get him to rest for now. "I was going to ask, those people we're supposed to be looking for, what do they call themselves again?"

Butler stopped so suddenly that Juliet nearly ran into him.

"Wha—?" She started before she realized exactly where they were. They were currently standing just a few feet away from a bookshop and a record store. They had arrived.

"Foaly wasn't exactly sure why, but he believes that it may be a code name." Butler said, pretending to study the books on display in the bookshop while in reality he was making sure that there were no eavesdroppers. It was only when he was sure that everyone was too busy with their own personal matters that he answered Juliet's question.

"They call themselves 'wizards.'"

.oo000HP&AF000oo.

It should come as no surprise that since Artemis had absolutely no prior knowledge to the structure of the building he had been imprisoned in, he had quite easily gotten hopelessly lost. It was as though the entire building had been specially designed to have a uniform pattern of dirt, mold, and cobwebs in order to confuse any prisoners who managed to escape their rooms. In short, it was very trying,

Artemis had passed several cells on his search for a way out. Fortunately, they were vacant. Unfortunately, each had been discolored with dark stains in various stages of freshness. As Artemis had no wish to share the fates of the previous inhabitants of those cells, he had continued his search with renewed determination.

But finding a way out was surprising difficult. It should have been facile to simply lurk in the shadows and find a staircase which would lead him to the ground floor. While there were few of the kidnapper's colleagues patrolling the hallways, each time Artemis managed to sneak down a staircase, he had the oddest sensation that he was going up instead.

Any windows he passed were little help since each showed different scenery, some set during the daytime, others during the night. It had been easy to conclude that the windows had been altered by magic in order to confuse any intruders, like himself. After the third staircase, he had been unable to find another, and thus, had to sneak around on that floor, searching for a way out.

_So, _Artemis thought, ducking behind a small pile of boxes which had been placed in a shadowy part of the hall. _Either I'm on the ground floor, or the very top. After all, I have no idea if my cell was underground or not. _

He wouldn't put it past his kidnappers to place spells meant to confuse one's sense of direction. A robe-clad man walked by, causing Artemis to tense up. That didn't really matter right now. What mattered was getting out alive, preferably before they realized he was gone. There was a hole in one of the boxes, just wide enough so that he could watch what happened in the hall while those in the hall had no idea of his presence. He peered through it.

"The prisoner's escaped!" The cry rang through the hallways.

Artemis sighed quietly. _That was fast, _he thought. _I had been hoping for a little more time. _

So much for being miles away before they became aware of his disappearance.

"What?" said the man who had walked passed Artemis. He turned to face the bearer of the news, an oily black haired man well past his prime. "How could a muggle escape?"

"Don't know, don't care." the black haired man snapped. "Just find him before the Dark Lord realizes this, or we all get it."

The other man was clearly scared of that possibility, judging by the way he paled.

The black haired man indicated one end of the hallway with a nod of his head. "You search over there and I'll go warn the others."

The other man snapped to attention and nodded pathetically. "Y-yes, of course." He practically ran away from Mr. Black Hair. It seemed he hadn't only been afraid of their boss.

_That was too close,_ Artemis thought, resisting the urge relax. _Hurry up and follow your companion. _

But Black Hair didn't show any indication of moving. He simply stood where he was, perhaps five feet away from Artemis, scanning the hallway. Twice his eyes passed over the pile of boxes Artemis had temporarily taken refuge behind.

Artemis became aware then just how sweaty his hands were, but he didn't look away from the spy hole. He had to be ready to run when Black Hair left. But when the man took a step, it was toward his pile of boxes.

Artemis was certain at the moment that he had stopped breathing, though his heart was thudding so loudly, it was a wonder the sound wasn't echoing throughout the hallway. He clenched his hands into fists and hoped the man was simply paranoid. This was too nerve-wrecking. He was definitely going to come back one day with reinforcements.

_Does he know I'm here?_ Artemis couldn't help thinking despite that fact, that logically, it should have been impossible.

The boxes were large enough so that he was completely hidden and his clothes were dark enough that even if someone glanced his way, they wouldn't be able to see him without taking a closer look. Artemis knew very little about their magic, but none of the other robe clad men he had passed had given any indication that they were aware of his presence.

Being ignorant was extremely frustrating. Artemis couldn't understand how the people of the world could bear with their ignorance on a daily basis. He was already wishing that he could take a break from hiding in order to conduct a few experiments. He glanced at his hands. Speaking of which, perhaps he should attempt to get the man to leave with the aid of his magic.

Abruptly, Black Hair seemed to decide that there was no one there, and turned to leave. Unfortunately, it wasn't very long before he stopped, due to the appearance of a suspicious blue glow from behind a pile of boxes, right from a certain missing prisoner's hands.

Artemis didn't bother to wonder why his hands had chosen that moment to glow. Nor did he pause and attempt to talk himself out of his current predicament. Instead, the boy genius put aside his pride and ran. Fast.

But the man was no slowpoke himself. He had paused for a second, probably from surprise, giving Artemis a good head start. But now his was right behind him, and catching up fast.

"The prisoner!" he shouted, drawing his wand, but not firing any curses. "I found the muggle! Stop!"

Artemis ignored him and continued to run, hoping Black Hair's shouts did not attract any more attention. Luckily for him, the man did not seem to want to hit him with any spells, probably hoping to catch him unharmed so that 'the Dark Lord' did not realize he had managed to slip away from them. And his earlier show with fairy magic had probably helped a bit.

Artemis neared the staircase, and was about to head down when he realized that Black Hair's cries had attracted attention. Quite a bit of it. More than was desired, actually.

The stairway was blocked by over a dozen robe clad men, all of whom were too surprised him and his sudden appearance to move and catch him. But Artemis wasn't going to stand around waiting for them to gather their wits.

In one smooth motion, he turned around, ducked under Black Hair's outstretched arm and continued to run. For good measure, he made sure to stomp down hard on Black Hair's right foot. Hearing the man shout in pain was satisfying enough to make Artemis ignore just how childish his act had been.

"After him!" Black Hair shouted, his voice ugly with barely suppressed rage and pain.

Perhaps aggravating his pursers was not a great idea, no matter how satisfying it was. Artemis was aware of the fact that he couldn't run forever, he was beginning to breathe heavily already. He rounded a corner, hoping that there was something, anything, on the other side that would help him out.

No such luck.

What he saw was half a dozen robe clad men running at him from the other side. Wonderful. One of them must has realized that if half of the group went the other way down the hall and the rest went after Artemis, they'd eventually meet, with Artemis right in the middle.

He was trapped and out of choices. Well, there was one ridiculous and almost idiotic choice left. Something that Artemis wouldn't even consider unless it was in a dire emergency, like his current situation. There was a window in the hallway, about halfway down the hall. If Artemis increased his speed just a little, he would be able to reach it before the group across from him.

It was a rough plan, he knew, with many things that could easily go wrong, but it was the best he could do at the moment. Artemis was more used to having time and being able to mediate while coming up with his ingenious schemes. Neither of these assets were available to him at the moment, so he was forced to improvise as he went along. And he was doing quite well so far. After all, he was still alive.

"_Stupefy_!" One young and overenthusiastic man cried out.

Artemis ducked to the left and felt something ruffle his messy hair as it barely missed him.

"Idiot, don't curse him!" Black Hair shouted, angry. "The Dark Lord doesn't want him harmed!"

They were getting desperate and that was dangerous. Artemis willed his feet to move just a little faster, the window grew nearer. He couldn't stop running to judge how high he'd have to jump to clear it, so he made a rough estimate. It was when he changed his direction and aimed for the window did Black Hair realize what the boy intended.

"He's going to jump! Stop him!" he hollered, struggling to run faster. Apparently, running in robes hampered your ability to freely race. Not by much, but just enough.

Artemis didn't stop to think. He took a great leap as soon as he was close enough and sailed out the window.

It was only then did he realize that he had jumped out of a window on the third floor, approximately twenty feet above a lake.

Artemis wasn't the type to curse often out loud. He had always left people who cursed were too unimaginative to express their feelings with more sophisticated language. But at the moment, he ignored his contempt for cursing and let out a string of colorful profanities.

And then gravity took over.

.oo000HP&AF000oo.


	6. The Danger Level Has Risen

_Disclaimer: If life were perfect, there'd be no war, no famine, and I'd own Artemis Fowl. But life is nowhere near perfect, so I don't own him. Unfair._

Chapter 6: The Danger Level Has Risen

It is quite rare for life to go exactly as one wishes it to. One may merely wish to marry their childhood sweetheart and live happily ever after. In reality, they may end up losing her to their worst enemy, being partly responsible for her murder, and spending all of their spare time attempting to keep the son of the sweetheart alive, which was quite a task, more difficult than convincing a poltergeist to not play pranks. In short, life was made up of seemingly random events which happened in a certain order to lead to a specific conclusion.

However, Severus Snape really did not see how getting his foot crushed by an adolescent muggle was supposed to lead to some happily ever after. He winced slightly as he turned away from the window that the idiotic muggle had jumped out of.

The rest of his colleagues (and he was using the term very loosely) were perilously leaning out the window, hoping to catch sight of the muggle so that they could send someone else down there to fetch him. No one wanted to be the one to venture into the dark, cruel waters of _that_ particular lake. It was infested with creatures that harboured an intense dislike for wizards and muggles alike. Even many of the Death Eaters nursed—and hid—a small fear of those creatures.

Rumour had it that Death Eaters who failed the Dark Lord one too many times were forced to wade into it, wandless. Rumour also had it that their screams could be heard for days afterward. Rumour it may be, but no one was foolish enough to test it out. And it was no secret that the Dark Lord only allowed the creatures to exist because he was fond of their cruel disposition.

Snape let his fellow Death Eaters scramble around the window for a moment before barking out an order.

"Get away from that window, you halfwits," he snarled. "The muggle's as good as dead now."

He ignored the slight chill that ate away at his heart as he said that. He was not sympathetic at all about the brat who had crushed his foot. He was not. But he could not get rid of the faint feeling of guilt that was present. The muggle had only been killed because of his resemblance to the Potter brat. It was unfortunate, but nothing could be done about it now.

One of the Death Eaters moved away from the window, smirking nastily.

"True," he said, twirling his wand in his right hand. "No filthy muggle would survive in that lake."

The others gave murmurs of agreement and turned away from the window. A few attempted to quietly inch away from the group, but a glare from Snape froze them in their tracks. It was good to know that his glares had not lost their effect since the end of the school year.

"No one will leave," he growled, outwardly glaring, inwardly scheming, "until we decide who tells our Lord about this."

As expected, the spineless imbeciles averted their eyes and began to mumble excuses.

"Why don't you inform our lord, Severus?" asked the Death Eater who had been the first to agree with Snape's assessment of the situation. His eyes glittered with cruel intent. "I'm sure the Dark Lord will be willing to forgive _you_ for it."

Snape met the man's eyes with a glare of his own. He had not missed the implications meant by the man's statement. He was well aware that not every Death Eater welcomed him back onto their side with open arms. Indeed, some believed that he was a traitor of the highest order, running back to the Dark Lord after spending years as Dumbledore's lapdog.

But they didn't know just how much of a traitor he really was. And it was imperative to his health that they never find out. Which meant that he had to watch his words. Which meant that he could not back down from the challenge. Which meant he had better prepare himself for a world of pain.

.oo000HP&AF000oo.

Falling is not a pleasant experience. There is no denying that fact.

Some people, however, crave that free-falling sensation. They visit amusement parks in order to ride gravity-defying roller coasters. They participate in the death-defying sport of bungee jumping. They jump out of helicopters with only a parachute protecting them from certain death. They craved that sudden, brief sensation of utter freedom.

Artemis Fowl was not one of these people. And even those brave individuals had to admit that free-falling more than twenty feet into a dirty lake of unknown depth is quite another story.

Artemis's mind steeled itself as he hit the water, fortunately feet first. Meeting the water head first at that height might have rendered him unconscious, which would not have helped him at all. Even though the cold had been anticipated, the sudden chill rendered his limbs and his brain useless. He fought the instinctive urge to open his mouth and breathe.

Artemis sank rapidly for several seconds, until his brain fought off the cold and began working again. He forced his numb limbs to move, in a decisively odd manner, similar to that of a one legged swimming toad. If his situation had not been so dire, Artemis would have felt quite humiliated.

His escape plan had not involved him almost drowning. All he could see through his half-lidded eyes was dark, murky water and a few air bubbles. Which way was up to the surface for air and which way was down into the dark for certain death? He had no clue. The fall had warped his inner compass.

Artemis twisted his body around, ignoring the burning sensation in his lungs. He was not an Olympic swimmer, and probably never would be, but he knew how to stop himself from sinking any further. At that moment, he extremely appreciated the swimming lessons he had been required to attend at the age of seven.

_Relax_, he told himself firmly. _P__anic__ and you'll die._

Though his eyes stung something fierce, he forced them wider open, taking note of his surroundings. Dark, dark, dark water surrounded him on all sides. He definitely did not want to venture any deeper in the lake, though in a moment, he would have no choice. His clothes were weighing him down, and he was tiring quickly.

In a moment or two, his supply of oxygen would run out; already his chest felt as though it would burst. He had to find out which way was up. Now. He tilted his head up, careful not to allow any water up his nose. More darkness. This was ridiculous; surely he hadn't managed to sink low enough that none of the sun's rays could penetrate the water. Then he looked down. And sure enough, beyond his feet, he could see faint blessed light.

_Found it_, he thought, relief making him light-headed. Or perhaps it was the lack of oxygen.

As he bent down and began to swim towards the light, a single amused thought crossed his mind. _I sincerely hope that heading towards the light leads me towards the surface and not the afterlife__._

It would be decidedly mortifying to escape from the madmen only to die of his own folly. Holly, for one, would never let him live it down.

He became acutely aware of the fact his lungs were on fire—figuratively speaking, of course. Each kick took more effort and propelled him forward fewer feet than the one before it. His feet now felt as though two boulders were strapped onto them in place of his worn-out sneakers.

___Just a few more feet…____Wait____…____was____ the light becoming fainter?_

His head snapped down, and his heart skipped a beat.

A…_creature_…had grabbed a hold of his half-frozen right foot and was dragging him down. Wonderful, of all the lakes to jump into, he just had to choose the one infested with merpeople, for he was quite sure that was what the being was.

The creature's broken yellow teeth were visible as it pulled the young boy further and further away from the surface, from the sweet, greatly desired air.

His vision was growing cloudy. His limbs were flailing about desperately in a futile attempt to break the grip. He twisted out of his sodden sweater, hoping it would allow him freer movement to try and escape. It didn't. The mer-thing's expression grew more amused as Artemis's need for air grew more apparent. The small area of his brain that was still functioning took offence. He was being toyed with for the second time that day.

The mercreature could easily have killed him with the crude spear gripped in its left hand, but it chose to draw out the inevitable. It seemed to find it more amusing to watch him struggle for release. Artemis was not going to stand—er, swim—for that.

_Let GO,_ he screamed mentally, aiming a kick at the creature with his free leg. To his surprise, the kick connected with a shower of blue sparks. The mercreature let out a shrill, piercing cry at the contact, its hold loosening just enough for Artemis to jerk his foot free. He aimed another kick at the creature, but his deprivation of oxygen was catching up with him.

He wasn't really sure if he had managed to scare the mer-thing away, but he couldn't see too well anymore. His limbs seemed to have been replaced with pieces of lead and his entire body was numb, to the point that he didn't even feel cold. The last thing that he saw was the faint gleam of light, high above him, with tiny blue sparks flitting about everywhere…

.oo000HP&AF000oo.

"There's nothing here, Dom," Juliet said, barely managing to keep the whine out of her voice. They had been standing inside of the bookstore for the past twenty minutes now, and she was itching to leave. "Just how much longer do we have to stand here?"

Butler didn't look up from the book he was thumbing through. To the world, he appeared absorbed in it. In reality, he was keeping an eye on the empty, weed-choked area next door through the window he was causally leaning against.

"Just a little bit longer," he replied in a pleasant tone, playing the part of a doting older brother. "I just need to find exactly what I need."

Translation: they were not moving until Butler saw whatever it was that he was looking for in that empty lot.

Juliet pouted, falling into the role of a pampered younger sister. She was thinking furiously, her mind still whirling with different possibilities as to why they were _here_ instead of looking for Artemis. She glanced at her brother's tight grip on the book in his hands. He was more worried than he appeared. She mentally sighed, running a finger across the "Do-it-Yourself" books on a shelf.

_Hey, maybe there's a book here about how to rescue a teenage boy who's too smart for his own good from people who call themselves wizards,_ she thought in an attempt to cheer herself up. Her eye fell on the title of a book that her finger had landed on and she froze.

"_How to Plan and Execute the Perfect Kidnapping"_ she read, deeply amused. _Okay…_

Curiosity spiked, she pulled the book off the shelf and read the first page. Within minutes, she was completely immersed in it. It was fascinating to see exactly how the people she was trained to protect Artemis from thought. Fascinating, and a tad frightening.

She didn't look up until her sharp ears picked up Butler's sudden intake of breath. She raised her eyes in time to see Butler put his book away and casually look at his watch.

"We need to hurry," he said, meeting her eyes. "We'll be late if we don't leave now."

She nodded in understanding, already setting her book down. As fascinating as it was, she could always come back for it later. What mattered now was that Butler had finally found what they were looking for. Whatever that was, she still had no idea.

They left the shop immediately, not even pausing to respond to the bookkeeper's annoyed glare. Juliet turned to the right, expecting them to head to the empty lot that Butler had been so fascinated with. To her surprise, though, Butler turned in the opposite direction, heading away from the lot.

"Where—?" she started before cutting herself off, pretending that a dress in a nearby window had caught her attention. She couldn't ask him here; too many possible loose ears. They had no idea if those "wizards" had hidden spies anywhere. Better safe than sorry.

Butler continued walking, pretending that he hadn't heard, though that wasn't at all unlikely considering the volume of the crowd. They continued down the path until they reached a stoplight. After the light flashed the universal signal for walk, they merged into the crowd as they walked to the other side.

Once there, Butler turned right, heading back to where they had been, only on the opposite side of the street this time. Butler took care to remain as inconspicuous as possible, and Juliet followed his lead. She wasn't exactly sure what the plan was, but she trusted her brother.

After all, he hadn't become the youngest graduate of Madame Ko's Personal Protection Academy on brawn alone. Butler usually preferred to let Artemis to develop the schemes, but when he had to, he could come up with a pretty mean plan. Juliet just hoped that this was one of those times, because frankly, she had no idea what her brother was doing.

Butler slowed his place as he reached the lady's clothes shop that was directly across from the empty lot he had spent the past hour studying. Juliet mimicked his actions while wondering, attempting to figure out his plan.

"Juliet," Butler said, shielding his eyes from the sun as he turned to face his sister. "Do you have a pair of sunglasses?"

Juliet blinked. Since when did Butler care about small issues like UV ray exposure? Nonetheless, like a good little sister, she reached for her sunglasses, only to be stopped by her older brother.

"Not those," he said, looking at her straight in the eyes. "The prescription pair that was specially made."

She understood what he meant instantly; he wanted the mirrored glasses that protected them against the fairy mesmer. What she didn't understand was why. Surely there weren't any cloaked fairies in the vicinity?

Despite her misgivings, she still opened her pack carefully, in order to make sure no foolish pickpocket attempted to snatch it from her, and pulled out two pairs of sunglasses. She kept the jade green ones for herself, and gave Butler the larger, blue pair.

Butler put them on casually, nodding his head while wordlessly moving his lips. An innocent bystander would automatically assume he was saying thanks. Juliet, however, knew better, and the fact that she could read lips helped as well.

She mimicked her brother's actions, placing the specially altered glasses on her nose and turning casually towards the empty lot. Only, it wasn't so empty anymore.

It took Juliet all of her willpower and then some more to keep her jaw off of the sidewalk.

.oo000HP&AF000oo.

Holly knew she was close the second Foaly's voice cut off in mid-rant. And it wasn't just her communicator which died; her wings began to malfunction at the exact same moment. Fortunately, the wings remained functional just long enough for Holly to near the ground, so that instead of plummeting fifty feet, she fell only twenty-five.

She did not manage to land on her feet, though. Thanks to a few conveniently placed trees and their branches, she landed far more comfortably on her backside than she would have if there had been nothing to slow her fall. Assuming she was still alive to experience the discomfort at that point, of course.

After checking quickly that all of her limbs were (miraculously) in working order and healing any deep wounds with a small amount of her magic, she turned her attention to her equipment. She was only slightly surprised to find that every single one of her weapons, her communicator, and even her specially designed watch had either ceased to function or had gone haywire and was slowly shutting down.

Holly sighed. ___Wonderful…just wonderful…_

She was willing to bet that to Foaly, it probably looked as if she had merely blinked out of existence. Just like Artemis had. Though she was annoyed and still a bit sore from her fall, Holly felt the urge to smile.

If Artemis was in this area, then the reason that the tracer had died was not because his heart had stopped beating, but because his kidnappers apparently had some method of rendering fairy technology useless. Meaning there was a good chance that Artemis was still alive. Meaning she had better get up and find him before he annoyed someone so much that they killed him just to get some peace and quiet. Heaven knew just how many times she had come close to doing so herself.

Wincing slightly from a few light bruises that she couldn't afford to waste magic on (there was no telling what condition she would find Artemis in), Holly got to her feet and surveyed her surroundings. It was then that she became aware of the odd sensation in the air. It wasn't entirely unlike the clean, pure feeling given off by her own magic, but this one definitely had a …_muddier_...feel to it. It made her feel both energized, ready for battle, and apprehensive, on her guard.

She shook her head to clear it, suppressing a shudder as the strange muddy feeling slid off her skin with a silent _plop_. No one could accuse Holly of being squeamish, but still, _ew_. That was disgusting. And the feeling was still there.

Repressing the slight nausea she felt, Holly turned her attention to her equipment. It was useless and a hindrance now, but she didn't dare leave it here. Who knew what would happen to it.

Sighing again, Holly closed her eyes and concentrated, pushing aside the queasiness. She could worry about the muddiness later; it didn't seem to be an apparent threat, aside from how gross it felt to her.

_There_.

She opened her eyes and faced the setting sun. The muddiness was strongest in that direction. The chances of that being where Artemis was held were high.

Determined, she set off, resolutely ignoring the fact that it felt like she was wading through mud. The muddiness wasn't hampering her movement, however, but it was there, clinging to every inch of her. It was highly uncomfortable. Artemis was really going to owe her big for this.

All thoughts of how she would never let the boy genius forget this flew from her head the minute she stepped into the clearing and saw the mansion in the center of a lake. Even by Mud Man standards, building a house in the center of a lake was decidedly odd. Or perhaps it wasn't. Holly wasn't an expert on the strange quirks of Mud Men, after all, and she really had no wish to ever try and understand them.

Either way, she had reached her destination. Unless, of course, there was another house somewhere in the middle of this forest that felt as though it was encased in mud. Somehow, she didn't think so.

Now all she needed was a way to get in, and it was just her luck that there were no muscled-brained Mud Men around when there was an actual use for them. She'd have to figure out another way to get an invitation into the dwelling, then.

Something moved at the corner of her eye, and she turned quickly, ready to fight if needed. Instead, she stopped breathing. Not literally, but breathing was the last thing on her mind at the moment.

There, at the edge of the lake, legs just barely out of reach of the water, lay the frightening still body of a young boy. The hair was messier and dirtier than she was accustomed to seeing it, and the clothes were alien, but there was no doubt in Holly's mind about the identity of the body.

As she rushed to his side, she just desperately hoped that she was wrong about his current state of being.

.oo000HP&AF000oo.


	7. Information Passed and Gathered

_Disclaimer: Don't own and don't care enough to think up a witty disclaimer. _

Chapter 7: Information Passed and Gathered

Juliet was stunned. No, scratch that, she was beyond stunned. She was _flabbergasted_.

Though who could really blame her? Most people would be just as staggered, if not more, had they been in her situation. While working for Artemis, she had grown accustomed to seeing strange sights, but this really took the cake. It wasn't as awe inspiring as meeting real live fairies, but then again, that really belonged in its own category. And seeing an entire building appear out of thin air deserved its own as well.

Juliet carefully avoided staring obviously at the huge, stone structure that had appeared in an _empty lot_ as she attempted to compose herself. But it didn't take long for her eyes to flicker back, just waiting for the thing to disappear as easily as it appeared. It didn't.

Then, on a whim, she slightly lowered her sunglasses and peered over them. The building had vanished. She raised her head and look through the lens. And now it was back. She looked over them again. Gone. Lower the glasses. And now back.

"Juliet."

She jumped slightly and presented her brother a rather sheepish grin. Right. Be discreet. She'd forgotten. Okay. So, back to the matter at hand, the vanishing dwelling. What the heck was going on? Shooting blasts of light with a stick was one thing. Cloaking an entire building was entirely another. Juliet was starting to get a very bad feeling about these 'wizards'. Especially when she recalled that Artemis was still in their grasp. If they could hide such a huge building in a well known, busy plaza, then what else could they do?

Pushing aside the increasingly morose thoughts, she turned to Butler who was not so patiently waiting for her to get over the shock. Hey, it wasn't her fault it was taking so long, he could have at least warned her. "Where are we going anyway?"

Butler checked the empty street and stepped off the curb. "Shopping." For answers.

Juliet pasted a huge grin on her face. "Alright! I just saw the cutest shirt, it'll look great on you!"

And on she prattled about the nonexistent shirt, donning again her cover of a little sister dragging her doting brother out for a day of shopping, as they crossed the street, heading towards the not-so-empty lot. She was well aware that Butler wasn't even listening to what she was saying, but it didn't bother her too much. Heck, _she _wasn't even paying much attention to what she was saying, and it was coming out of her mouth.

They reached the front of the building, which Juliet now saw bore a sign proclaiming the place as "The Leaky Cauldron." She couldn't help but give a rather unladylike snort at that. Really, what kind of name was that? She turned towards her brother, to see if they would be going in the oddly named shop.

Butler reached out one hand for the doorknob.

And that's when everything went weird. It wasn't exactly like when Holly had put her under _mesmer_, the first time they had met, but it wasn't totally different either. Before she could fully grasp what was happening, her feet were swiftly taking her _away_ from the Leaky Cauldron. Butler was right behind her, though moving at a much slower pace. It was almost like he was trying but failing to resist something.

The sudden compulsion to get away from the lot vanished as quickly as it came. Juliet blinked and found herself back on the other side of the street, in front of the clothing store. What the—? She almost jumped out her skin when a hand touched her arm, but it was only Butler. Though his face was as composed as ever, she had little doubt that the eyes hidden behind the sunglasses were as confused as hers.

What the heck had just happened?

.oo000HP&AF000oo.

Snape was not in the best of moods when he entered the headquarters for the Order of the Phoenix, and for once, he had a liable excuse for his bad humor. After all, only a lunatic would walk away joyful from a meeting with the Dark Lord, and Snape liked to believe that despite the countless years he had spent attempting to educate the so-called-future-generation, he still had complete possession of his sanity. Amazingly.

Flinging his cloak at the coat rack which swiftly caught it, he proceeded down the hallway, taking care not to limp or wake Black's blasted mother. He did not need to deal with that witch after an hour with _him_. Actually, he had no wish to deal with the 'defender's of the Light' either, but Dumbledore needed to be told of the recent events, and if he had to suffer their company, then he was damn well going to choose the time himself. Though there really was no point for him to suffer as the foolish muggle was no doubt beyond help, likely devoured by the merfolk in the lake he had dived head first into. But, the headmaster would probably want to at least honor his death or some noble rubbish like that.

He reached the room in which the meetings usually took place fairly quickly, being fortunate enough to not encounter any of the usual residents of the building. Even the little hellions who usually loitered outside the doors, hoping to catch a hint of what was happening inside, were missing. Good. He'd have that much less of a headache to deal with when all this was over.

Not bothering to knock, he muttered the password and wrenched the door open. Entering with his trademark sneer on his face, he coolly met with the startled faces of the metamorphic girl, the werewolf, Black, and Weasly Senior and the annoying serene face of the Headmaster. Wonderful, precisely what he needed right now; to deal with all the people who ranked extremely close to Potter in terms of annoyingness.

"Severus, just the man we were waiting for," Dumbledore said as though Snape crashing the meeting had been planned.

Ignoring, for once, Black who was attempting to glare a hole into him, Snape cut straight to the chase. "Where's Potter?"

Despite all the evidence that stated otherwise, he had to be certain the muggle had not been Potter in a bad disguise. He did not want the blood of Lilly's son on his hands.

Dumbledore calm exterior flickered a bit. "I believe he and his friends are currently in Diagon Alley, stocking up on school supplies. They left, perhaps an hour ago."

He turned to Wealsy Senior and Black for confirmation. Both nodded, the latter doing so with a suspicious, borderline concerned, look.

Snape let the tiny bit of unease that had been fostering inside of him fade at that. Good. For once Potter was not directly involved with this. Now he just had to get rid of the guilt that was residing in him because of the muggle.

"Why?" Black snapped, not being able to keep silent any longer. Still, he had lasted longer than Snape had expected him to. "Since when do you give a whit about what Harry's doing?"

Snape sneered. "I wouldn't care if your _godson_ decided to dye his hair green and join the League of Leprechauns, Black. I only ask because Malfoy and McNair arrived today with someone who looked _extraordinarily _like him in tow."

The effect of his words was instantaneous. The werewolf paled several shades, the girl gasped in horror, Weasly seemed close to suffering a heart attack, and Black dove straight at him, roaring like the animal that he was. Naturally Snape had to draw his wand to defend himself.

"Silence."

Despite the fact that Dumbledore had neither raised his voice nor backed up his words with a curse, everyone in the room froze. For a decrepit, old man, he was certainly radiating an astounding amount of authority.

"Explain please, if you would Severus." He said, his tone indicating that he was not giving Snape a choice. "And the Sirius, I would appreciate it if you refrained from attacking my Potions Master. He is merely the messenger, after all"

Black reluctantly backed down, and, with even more reluctance, put away his wand. Snape kept his own out, not wanting to take chances when there were two bloodthirsty animals in the room. He had been around enough Dark creatures to know that the werewolf was currently attempting to keep his 'better' half in check.

"The boy was Potter's bloody twin," Snape said once he took his seat, as far away from Black and Lupin as possible. "Same sorry excuse for a haircut, same rags, same…eyes. But he wasn't Potter."

Everyone relaxed visibly at that, Snape noted with disgust. It hadn't even occurred to them that the Dark Lord would not take to kindly to the deceit, unintentional or not.

"Wait," Weasly said, revolting concern lacing his voice. "What happened to the poor boy?"

Snape raised an eyebrow. Well, what do you know, a Weasly that could think. Amazing. "He's dead."

Lupin stood up suddenly, and just as abruptly, sat back down. His hands were visibly trembling as he tried to calm himself down. Snape watched warily as the metamorphic girl hesitantly put a hand on the werewolf's arm, recalling that the full moon was only a few days away. He knew that it became harder to the werewolf to control himself the closer the day arrived, but that did not mean he had to acknowledge the fact.

"Shall I continue?" he drawled, ignoring the glares the act earned him. Merlin, Lupin was a grown man, not a bloody child. He had no time for these pointless disturbances.

"Yes, go ahead, Severus," Lupin said with a sickeningly rueful smile. "I apologize for the interruption."

Snape snorted and continued, not giving any indication that the apology had been acknowledged. "Foolish boy somehow managed to destroy the door to his cell and escape."

Black opened his mouth to no doubt say something idiotic, but one look from the headmaster shut him up. Snape ignored them both and kept talking.

"Idiot boy didn't even bother to keep himself out of sight," he drawled, giving the impression that he did not care a whit about what had happened. And really, he did not. "I gave him all the chances he needed, even sent that pathetic newbie away and took my time spreading the news that he escaped. But he still managed to let himself be seen."

"Why didn't you just help him escape?" Black snapped. "Why didn't you do that, you gres—"

"How did the boy die?" Lupin cut in before his friend could shove his foot any deeper into his own mouth.

Snape ignored both of them and kept talking. He didn't remotely care if the others missed what had occurred as long as Dumbledore didn't. "Moron ran right into a group that was heading to the dungeons. And then went and jumped out the window."

"Right into the lake?" Dumbledore asked, fully aware, like the rest of the table, of the inhabitants of the lake.

Snape snorted. "Where else?"

"I see," Dumbledore said, sounding somber. "His body?"

"Hasn't been found yet. Probably nothing left at this point."

He didn't bother to mention that no one had really searched, having immediately the boy off as dead when his tattered sweater had drifted to the surface. They all knew from experience that the merpeople of the lake never left any bigger a trace of their victims behind.

"Do you have any idea who he really was?" Weasly asked, looking quite ill presumably at the boy's fate. "A name? A location?"

Snape gave him a look of utter contempt but answered. "None. For a good fifteen minutes, everyone was under the impression he was Potter."

"The poor parents," the girl whispered, clutching the werewolf's hand.

Snape sneered at the revolting sight. Puppy love. Pathetic.

"Why wasn't he killed immediately?" Black asked suddenly, carefully not looking at Snape as he spoke. "Why didn't Voldemort kill him when he realized the boy wasn't Harry?"

The spy's bad mood further darkened. Black, thinking and actually asking something borderline intelligent. He wanted to kill something. Now. Preferably, the canine.

"Yes, why?" Dumbledore repeated, probably sensing that Snape was intending to ignore the question as it had been asked by Black.

Not feeling too fond of the headmaster either, Snape glared. "The Dark Lord found him…interesting. The boy held off the Crutious Curse with…sparks."

"Fire?" Lupin questioned.

"Blue sparks."

"Alright, not fire then," the werewolf amended, scholarly curiosity bright in his eyes. "Magic?"

"The boy was clearly a muggle," Snape snarled back. Merlin, hadn't they been listening? "I don't know what he did, but whatever it was, it bought him some time, not that that it did much good for him in the end."

The table was silent as everyone absorbed the information that they had been presented with. Something that could stop one of the Unforgivables? Not probable. But definitely useful. Too bad it was impossible for them to find out more now. Personally though, Snape would much rather simply suffer through the curse than be saved by _sparks_, particularly _blue_ sparks. Did the muggle think he was a bloody pixie or something?

"The body has not been found you said?" Dumbledore said, thoughtfully. Snape didn't bother to answer, and it seemed he didn't need to as the old man continued speaking. "Have you searched the area?"

Snape grunted a negative. He had been too busy…relaying the news to Voldemort.

"Please see to it that you do." Dumbledore said, looking intently at him. "There may be a chance that the boy is still alive."

With a curt nod, Snape got up to leave, ignoring the surprised faces of the other occupants of the table. The boy was dead; nothing survived that lake, not even with the aid of blue glitter. But he would humor the headmaster if it meant that he could leave—

"Oh, and Severus?"

He stopped and turned to the headmaster, hiding the feeling of impatience with annoyance. What now? He'd already told them what his Most-Darkest-of-All Lord was bloody well doing. Couldn't they let him go now?

"Be sure to visit Madame Pomfrey as soon as you can."

Snape's lips curled unpleasantly as he turned around and carefully not limped out the door. Bloody all-knowing old man.

.oo000HP&AF000oo.

Holly was by the boy's side quicker than a dwarf on pure, untouched dirt. Turning him carefully onto his back, she pressed two fingers to his neck, searching desperately for a pulse. She allowed herself to relax only slightly when she found one, faint but clearly there. The Mudboy was still alive. Good, now she could still kill him once she got them both to safety.

But, first, she had to find out what condition the genius was in. Quickly scanning him, she was surprised to find no injuries. Artemis was soaked to the bone, his clothes were torn in several places, and his right shoe was missing its bottom, but there were no visible injuries, aside from the fact he was unconscious. Nothing, not even broken or scratched skin under the ripped pieces of clothing. Either the Mudboy was extremely lucky, or she was missing sometime vital.

But this was not the time to ponder on the miracle lack of injuries. The fairy stood up and proceeded to drag the boy out of the water, to the trees that would provide at least some cover should someone happen by. It was a rather difficult task as he was almost twice her size.

Holly grunted as pulled as much as she dared to without hurting the boy. D'arvit, and he was _heavy_. She was definitely going to make him go on a very long diet after all this was over. She paused for a moment to catch her breath. Oh, yes, she was certainly going to make him diet, long and hard.

Once she had gotten them both under the dubious safety of the trees, Holly turned her attention back onto the genius, who was still out cold. That on its own was quite worrying. Despite her careful efforts, the journey to the foliage had been anything but smooth. Anyone else would have been awake and complaining by now. But not Artemis it seemed; the boy appeared to be an exception to everything.

He was still breathing, the light rise and fall of his chest provided indication that he was among the living. Perhaps a concussion then? She gently pushed away the damp hair covering the boy's forehead, searching for even the slightest marring of skin. But the pale skin was perfectly smooth, not even blemished with the pimples that plagued most his age.

Holly bit her lip, thinking furiously as she absently continued to smooth down his muddled hair. She couldn't rule out internal bleeding, but should she really risk a healing right now? She had no idea where Artemis was injured, or even if he indeed was in need of healing. The boy wasn't helping matters at all by stubbornly staying unconscious. There were so many things that could go wrong, especially if something inside of him was injured. A lung healing around a rib, a bone setting crookedly, bone marrow seeping into his blood stream, heading to his heart…

She shook her head to clear it of the increasingly pessimistic thoughts. This wasn't like her, focusing on the worst case scenarios like this. What was wrong with her today? The odd sensation in the air must be affecting her more than she had originally thought.

She put a hand on his pale, damp arm, frowning at how cold the skin was under her touch. She needed to find a way to dry him off, or at least, get him out of these clothes. Hyperthermia would not be a pleasant addition to the current list of issues.

The fairy quickly scanned her equipment again, hoping that, by some miracle, at least one of them had started working again. But, one could only be optimistic to a certain degree before becoming wishy washy. The com was still out as well, unfortunately.

She turned back to Artemis and saw that he had started shivering slightly. His breathing was still the same, as was his heartbeat, but his temperature was clearly dropping. And not even her thermal blankets were working. D'arvit.

But she took it out anyway, and wrapped it around him, thanking Foaly for having chosen to provide her with a very sensible moss green one. The last thing she needed was for a bright rainbow blanket to signal to everyone their location. Speaking of which, she scanned the area quickly, where had Artemis's kidnappers gone? Where they currently looking for them, or did they have yet to discover his absence?

She checked the boy again, and was relieved to see that some of the blue on his lips had faded into a healthier pink. At least she wouldn't have to be dealing with a genius icicle anytime soon. She placed a hand over his heart again, to check if his heartbeat had stabilized from the heat of the blanket. But there had been no change. D'arvit, there might really be something wrong with him.

Making a split second decision that she really hoped she would not regret later, Holly carefully sent a single spark of her magic to the hand still over the genius's heart, letting it dance onto the immobile boy. It wasn't enough to heal any sort of damage, but enough to possibly alert her to an injury she could not see. But the last thing she expected to see was the spark multiplying, feeding off of something that was not from her, and flittering all over the boy.

Her eyes narrowed. Either the muddiness in the air was having some strange influence on her magic, or Artemis was a lying, little sneak. For his sake, she hoped it was the former, but past experience had her leaning on the latter.

.oo000HP&AF000oo.


	8. Suspicions Roused

_**Big thank to everyone who reviewed/alerted/faved/read last chapter. And thanks especially to those who didn't give up on me updating. And especially, especially thanks to **_**winterwings6 **_**and**_ **randomloser1243810 **_**who kept poking me to update. Sometimes poking is the only way to get someone to do something. **_

_Disclaimer: If you haven't understood that I don't own Artemis Fowl or Harry Potter by _now_ then I'm sorry. There's just no hope for you. _

Chapter 8: Suspicions Roused

It was fairly obvious that something was wrong at the semi-permanent headquarters for the Order of the Phoenix. The tense atmosphere was a dead giveaway, as was the cagey look in very adult's eyes. Oh, and Sirius trying smoother him to death with a hug the minute he stepped into the kitchen tipped Harry off as well.

"Sirius—let _go_," he managed to choke out, one hand trying to straighten his askew glasses while the other attempted to push the overzealous godfather away. "Can't _breathe._"

Sirius didn't appear to hear him and continued with his smothering. "You're alright." he muttered, his grip tightening. "You're fine."

Harry tried to send a plea for help to Ron and Hermione but it was a difficult task to accomplish when he couldn't break out of the tight hold long enough to face them. Judging by their snickers though, it didn't seem like they'd help on their own anytime soon. Some friends they were, he was being smothered to death, and all they could do was laugh!

Luckily for Harry, someone decided to take pity on him.

"He won't be if you don't let go soon." Lupin said coming up behind Sirius. His voice was odd, as though he were forcing his tone to remain light. His gaze was fixed on Harry. "Let him go, Padfoot."

"What?" Sirius blinked at him uncomprehending until Lupin nodded pointedly at the boy who was struggling vainly in his arms. "Oh—sorry, Harry." He let go quickly and stepped back, a very unconvincing, slightly shaky grin on his face.

"I was only gone for a few hours, Sirius," Harry said, once he caught his breath. He straightened his robes and pointedly ignored Ron who was smirking at him. "What was that all about?"

His godfather tried another grin. This one was too wide to not be faked. "Nothing, nothing. Just…" he trailed off, clearly searching for an excuse.

Remus helpfully provided him with one. "It was just Sirius being Sirius."

"Right—hey!"

"How did your shopping trip go?" Remus asked, not taking notice of his friend's indignant protests. He smiled at the three friends, and while his grin was more natural than Sirius's had been, it was still noticeably strained. "Did you manage to get everything on your lists?"

It was obvious that Remus was trying to change the subject. Harry opened his mouth to demand again what was wrong, but Hermione shut him up with a discreetly placed sharp elbow. He winced and inched away from her, rubbing his newest bruise.

"We found everything fine," Hermione informed the adults. Aside from a quick warning glance, she took no notice of Harry's glare. "Mrs. Weasly had Fred and George arrive earlier with the rest of the bags."

"After she made them take that biting hex off," Ron added, rubbing his left hand absently. He didn't seem to have noticed Lupin's obvious diversion. Or maybe he had and was following Hermione's lead in order to protect himself from sharp jabs. Harry wasn't sure which. "It would have been seriously wicked, if they had tried it on me first."

"I thought it was pretty funny," Harry put in, grinning at the memory of Ron howling and hopping around the store with a paper bag gnawing on his hand.

"You would," Ron accused him. "The twins didn't play a single prank on you the entire time we were there."

"It was rather amusing though." Hermione interjected, smiling at the memory. "Especially when the bag bit your—"

"Thank you, moving on," Ron cut in before she could finish.

Sirius laughed and even Lupin smiled. They both looked considerably happier and less worried than before. Harry decided it was a good time as any to ask about their earlier anxiety.

"So, what's been going on here?" he asked innocently. He ignored Hermione's wince at his not so subtle hints.

Sirius started to reply. "I—"

"Nothing," Lupin interrupted. He gave Sirius a look. "Just the usual issues with the house and all. Nothing important."

Sirius shut his mouth and nodded in agreement.

Harry frowned, not satisfied with that answer. Before he could say anything though, the kitchen's door opened and Ron's father came in.

"Sirius? Did Snape send any word yet about th—" He broke off when he noticed the three students. His eyes immediately focused on Harry and the same odd, relieved look that had appeared on Lupin and Sirius face before passed over his. "Oh, er, you lot back already? How'd it go, find everything okay?"

"Why does everyone keep asking that?" Ron said, incredulously. He starred at all the adults as though there was something wrong with them. "It was just a little shopping trip. We were barely gone at all."

"Yes, good, good," Mr. Weasly said absently. His gaze finally shifted away from Harry and onto Lupin and Sirius. "Can I talk to you two about, er, out in the hall?"

"Of course." Lupin replied quickly, heading out followed closely by Sirius.

"Okay, what was _that_ all about?" Ron muttered, frowning as the kitchen rapidly emptied out.

Harry shrugged and glanced at Hermione. The curious expression her face told Harry that she hadn't missed the oddness of the adult's behavior either.

Something was wrong.

.oo000HP&AF000oo.

Artemis wasn't waking up.

Though the fact alone wasn't enough to completely dispel Holly's homicidal feelings toward him, it was enough to put a serious damper on them. Really, she had every right to be mad at the boy. He had lied, gotten kidnapped, lied, knocked himself out, lied, and successfully ruined her day. But she couldn't effectively stay mad because the bloody genius was determined to stay unconscious.

This was in no way fair.

She checked his heartbeat again, frowning when she found that it wasn't any different than before. Her failed attempted at healing hadn't improved Artemis's condition any. On the bright side, it hadn't worsened it either. His shivering had completely stopped by now though, the blanket had made sure of that, but he was still wet. And comatose.

Holly hadn't ruled out a possible concussion, but she still hadn't found any bruises on his head that could possibly be the cause of his current state. Her magic, before it had been countered or whatever it was that Artemis had done, had told her nothing. And, Artemis hadn't moved an inch of his own accord since she'd found him.

In short, she still had no idea what was wrong with him. And she had no way to get him to a place where smart people with more expertise in this area than she could find out what was wrong. Her wings were down, and Artemis was too heavy for her to carry. She'd only barely managed to drag him to where they were currently camping. And, to top it all, she was starting to get a headache from the breathing in the muddy air for so long.

The bush to her left rustled suddenly, and leaves crunched noisily as someone stepped on them. Holly's gun was almost immediately in her hands. It probably wouldn't work, but hey, she could still chuck it someone's head. The crunches grew louder, nearing them. Holly glanced at Artemis. There was no place for her to hide him. She'd just have to hit the prowler with a mesmer, or the gun, as soon as she saw him.

Her eyes widened as the intruder stepped into view.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, incredulously as she lowered the gun.

Mulch grinned at her, pulling stray leaves out of his beard. "Spreading world peace."

Holly smiled in spite of herself. "You sure it's not destruction and mayhem? Nice to see you, Mulch."

"Back at you. Nice time to take a nap though." Mulch said, eyeing Artemis's unconscious form curiously. "Everyone's going crazy looking for him, and here he is, catching some z's."

"He isn't napping," Holly informed him. "I fished him out of a lake back there."

"Ah, well, then it's a good thing your knight in muddy clothes is here, isn't it?" He poked Artemis with a stick he had picked up nearby. "Whoa, he really is out of it. Anyway, Foaly sent me after you, when you dropped off his radar."

Holly smiled. Good old reliable Foaly. "Remind me to send him a basket of carrots when we get back."

"Hey, I'm doing all the work," Mulch protested. "What about me?"

"I'll send you one too." She promised.

"Nah, I'll pass on the veggies. Just give me complete control of the remote for a month and we'll call it even."

"A week."

"Two."

"Done."

Something rustled faintly in the bushes nearby. Almost instantly, Holly's gun was in her hand again and trained in the direction of the noise. Mulch inched behind her for safety. The rustling stopped and a bird called somewhere above them.

"We should probably get going." Mulch observed. "It's never a good idea to be out in a forest at night. Trust me I know."

"You're right," Holly agreed, putting away her gun. She didn't relax though, and continued to scan warily the area every few seconds. "How did you get here?"

Mulch grinned. "I, er, _borrowed_ Fowl's jet and flew it here. Got to the edge of the forest before it started losing power. I landed it and tunneled the rest of the way."

"I didn't know you knew how to pilot." Holly said, surprised.

"I'm a dwarf of many talents." Mulch bragged, as he grabbed Artemis from under the shoulders and started to lift him up. "By Frond, he's _heavy_."

"He needs a good diet." Holly added, helping him out. She maneuvered the boy until he was on Mulch's back, arms wrapped loosely around the dwarf's neck. "Think he'll manage a good grip unconscious?"

"Maybe." Mulch started to shrug but stopped in the middle when Artemis started to slip off. "I can always go back to get him if he doesn't."

Holly frowned. "Maybe."

"You want to carry him to the plane?" Mulch asked. "It's only a mile from here."

"Point. A little dirt won't hurt him."

Mulch snickered. "I don't think he'll feel the same way."

Holly smiled wryly, remembering the blue sparks that had countered her magic. "He'll just have to deal."

Mulch eyed her warily. "What'd he do now?"

Another bird call echoed though the air. This one was further than the one before.

Holly started gathering her stuff. "I'll tell you later. Let's start moving."

She folded up the blanket and adjusted her broken wings as Mulch picked out a good place to start tunneling. She was checking to make sure nothing had been left behind when Mulch spoke again.

"Oh, by the way Holly, I'm really hurt," Mulch said, making a very unsuccessful attempt at a pout. It was virtually impossible for someone with that much facial hair to pull off a passable pout. "Aren't we partners? And yet, you went after the little Mudboy without even waiting for me."

"Sorry Mulch," Holly said, guiltily. She had left rather hastily. "I was in a hurry."

The dwarf sniffed sadly. "Well, I guess it's okay. I suppose I'll just have to accept that you'll always care _more_ for the Mudboy than for me."

His jaw was unhinged and he was several feet under before Holly could punch him like she very much desired to.

.oo000HP&AF000oo.


End file.
